The Lost Wedding Ring

               A few weeks ago, my husband sat down next to me on the couch and said those words that can strike fear in the heart of a spouse.  He said, “I need to talk to you about something.”  When either of us has had something important, intimate or controversial to discuss, we have used a similar phrase.  My reaction to the phrase most likely goes back to my dating days, when it was followed by words to the effect of “you are a very nice girl, but . . .” and the relationship was over.

              

               This time the phrase was followed by, “I can’t find my wedding ring.”  I could tell how awful he felt about it.  He remembered being in church and knocking the ring against the pew on a Thursday night and then when he was driving on Friday; the ring wasn’t on his finger. So the timeframe when he lost it and the places he traveled led both of us to believe it was somewhere in the house.  I let him know that the ring is only a symbol and that it would turn up. 

               

                 Quiet frankly, in the business of the fall activities, I forgot about our conversation, only to be reminded when I ran across my husband dumping the paper recycling out on the garage floor to go through it before it went to the curb for pickup, or when he spent an entire day cleaning out his closet to, unsuccessfully, look for it.

               

                 For me, it is not the ring that binds us together as husband and wife, but our vows before God, that covenant that makes us one.  And after 18 years of marriage, it is certainly not the ring that keeps us together, but the willingness to love each other by giving out entire selves.  At one point when we were in conversation, I let him know that if the ring was not found, we would pick out another one and have it blessed by our Pastor.  In the whole realm of the stresses of life, I didn’t want him to worry about a piece of gold.  Especially since one of the reasons he lost the ring is that he has lost 40 pounds in the past few months and his finger is now thinner.

              

                 Last Friday, I received an email that said that the ring was found.  My son was going through his Scouting backpack, preparing for another camping trip and at the bottom of the bag, he found my husband’s ring (and $16 in cash that he didn’t know he had)!  I could feel the elation and relief that my husband was experiencing as I read the message.

               

               And so the ring is found!  But even better is the knowledge that our marriage is built on solid ground, not on all of the trimmings of our wedding day.  I am thankful for this experience and asked him to go get the ring sized this week, so we wouldn’t have to experience it again!