Mary of Nazareth

               Today I drove 200 miles, mainly in sloppy rain to Somerset, New Jersey.  Tomorrow begins the Catholic Writers Conference, a three day extravaganza of workshops and presentation for writers who are “rooted in the Gospel, writing for the world.”

               Tonight there was a showing of a new movie being distributed by Ignatius Press about Mary, the Mother of God.  I was so moved by the movie that I have to write about it before I can go to sleep.  Making a movie about Mary is difficult, given the amount of first-hand accounts that are available.  It is a beautiful, viable account of Mary’s life.

               In this film, Mary is portrayed as a woman who always has faith in God.  It is that faith that allows her to live through the difficult times and to guide her family and those who love Jesus as tragedy strikes.  The relationship between Mary and Joseph, knowing they are parents to the Messiah is beautifully illustrated throughout their lives. And the unique relationship between Mary and Jesus is also well portrayed.

               Favorite scenes include:

                Joachim, Mary’s father says something to the effect of, “Mary has always been a mystery, too much of a mystery for me”. 

               When Mary tells her parents of the visit from the angel and that she wants to visit Elizabeth.  Her parents deny that Elizabeth can be pregnant, at her age.  Yet she is determined to do God’s will and cajoles them (and Joseph) into letter her go.

                 In an incredibly touching scene between Mary and Zachariah on the steps outside his house, he is puzzled that he, a priest, could not believe God.  And yet Mary, a young girl, was able to have faith and believe in God’s plan.

               Mary and Joseph first became aware that Jesus was not to belong only to them in the scene when the three dozen or more shepherds arrive to see the Messiah. One shepherd wanted to hold Jesus and Mary lets him and then he passes Jesus to the next and on and on, each person gently kissing the new born.

               Mary’s telling of the story when Jesus was lost in the temple was beautifully depicted, as is the near stoning of Mary Magdalene, and the telling of the prodigal son parable.  The trial, scourging, and crucifixion are always difficult to watch.  I love the resurrection scene with Mary Magdalene. (I hope I didn’t give away the ending.)

               After I have digested the contents of the movie, I want to write in detail how this movie has changed how I view Mary.  It will help me to love her even more.

               Ignatius Press is releasing this movie on September 8^th for use by non-profit groups to show it in movie theaters.  This is the same method they used for Restless Heart, the movie about St. Augustine last year.  To get information on how to screen this movie, contact screenings@carmelcommunications.com.

A Road Trip

               A few days ago, my sister called and asked me to drive with her to pick up her son at College for Thanksgiving break.  His college is four hours away. This is his first time home since he left for his freshman year at College in August.  My sister and I live about an hour apart, but we haven’t seen much of each other this year.  The idea of taking this road trip was delightful.

               My family vacations growing up were always road trips.  My parents purchased a trailer when I was 6 years old and we would travel the country, camping in the trailer. One summer, we drove from Detroit to California and back.  As an adult, I have flown to the destinations for most of my vacations. I look forward to retirement when my husband and I can hop in the car and travel to interesting and unknown destinations.

               We drove from up I-270 and I-70 to the turnpike and eventually ended at Duquesne University in Pittsburgh.   We drove past the outlet mall and resisted the temptation to shop, toward the mountains on a crystal clear day.  After a short stop for restrooms and coffee at Breezewood, we entered the turnpike and drove past farms, through the tunnel and small towns, viewing dozens of billboards.

               The best part about road trips is the opportunity to talk and to listen, to comment on what is seen and share what you had meant to share.  We talked about our faith, when we first really believed; I shared the reason for why our family changed churches.  We briefly talked politics and she shared what it was like to be an empty nester.

               For me, one of the more interesting observations was a Dunkin’ Donuts billboard.  It let the passersby know that Dunkin Donuts was 32 miles away.  It also said “Wi-FI” and “drive thru”, right next to each other.  I began to giggle and my sister said, “What is going on?”  It took me a few moments to compose myself and share how the billboard seems to sum up current lifestyles. 

               “Drive thru” because we never have time to sit down and enjoy a cup of coffee.  Let just get our caffeine fix and go.  And “Wi-Fi” because why would you ever want to sit down and enjoy a cup of coffee without being connected to the phone and internet?

               That led us to a long discussion about what is important in life.  For me, spending eight hours in the car with my sister talking and listening is one of the important times of life!

Pure Gift

                I recently heard someone refer to an experience in his life as “pure gift”.  I may have heard this term before, but didn’t pay attention to it.  This time, I halted in my tracks and need to ponder the meaning and search my life for time of pure gift.

                The “pure gift” received by this individual was a vacation.  He was invited to go on vacation by a friend who had been given the use of a timeshare for a week.  Out of the blue, someone offered him the use of airline miles, if he ever had a need. The week was filled with great weather, terrific friendship, favorite activities and joy. 

                Pure gift is the way I now would describe last year for my family, although it was difficult to think of unemployment as any sort of gift.  If you read this blog, you will know that my husband was unemployed for most of 2011, being laid off in early January just three days short of his 21^st anniversary. Although he received a generous severance package, the shock of not going to work was difficult.    

                By early April, it was apparent that this search was going to be much more difficult than originally thought.  We enjoyed the time together as a family.  He attended every one of our son’s basketball, baseball and football games and became involved in a men’s faith group at church.  He also spent much time with his parents, who live with us.  And the two of us had more time together than we have had since early in our marriage.

                In June, the job search took a back seat to my father in law’s failing health.  My husband had to take my father in law to the emergency room on Father’s Day.  We didn’t realize that he would not return to our home.  Weeks of hospital care, interspersed with re-hab in a nursing home, ended in early August when his father died.  Without a job, my husband was able to spend many hours with his father and mother during those weeks.

                September came, and we were hopeful that a job would be just around the corner. Fortunately, my business had picked up considerably, which meant we were able to take a smaller amount out of saving each month.  Although he had a number of interviews, including some second interviews, in early December, we began to look at our savings, to determine where we would take money from to live.

                Then, on a Sunday, he had an interview.  By this time, I wasn’t paying too much attention to first interviews.  It was good to see my husband in a suit as he headed out the door.  He received a job offer the next day.  When he had me listen to the voice mail, I just looked at him.  Just as suddenly as he became unemployed, he was employed.

                He has been back to work for two months.   I am so thankful for the time of unemployment.  We still had some money left over from his severance package, he walk the last days with his father in a way that would not have been possible had he been employed.  His relationship with our son and with me is strong and his relationship with God grew exponentially. 

                Truly this is pure gift.

A 17th Wedding Anniversary

My husband and I celebrated our 17^th anniversary earlier this month.  That particular day, a Saturday, was extremely busy for our family.   We realized a week before the anniversary that we would have little time for just “us”. 

This type of “celebration” seems particularly appropriate for this time in our lives.  While our marriage is the foundation of all that we do, right now, little of our “doing” is for each other.  Our lives are more about taking care of our son and my husband’s mom than it is about the two of us. Four years from now, our son will be in college and we can do whatever we want on our anniversary.  (I’m thinking a European Cruise might be in the mix!) 

The morning of our anniversary, we attended our son’s first high school football game and brought my mother- in- law with us. We cleaned house and did some volunteer work, ending the day with a family dinner. 

It has always been my mindset that our wedding anniversary is a private celebration -something that only the two of us celebrate.  And this being the 17^th year, it was not an “important” anniversary (I don’t ever know if there is a suggested gift for seventeen).
That mindset changed this year.  We did receive an extraordinary number of anniversary greetings from family and friends.  With each greeting, I thought, “Our anniversary is only for us.” 

My thought changed as I was reading magazine covers in the grocery store.  Some make known the steps to plan a perfect wedding.  Others claim to know the inside workings of celebrity marriage.  Wearing the right clothes, having a picture perfect physique and a beautiful home are all keys to success, according to various tabloids.  Not one mentions our spiritual side, that giving is better than receiving or that God will meet all of our needs.

Perhaps, I thought, this anniversary does not just mark the 17^th celebration of the day we committed our lives to each other. Our marriage is not simply the celebration of our love for each other, but for the union of our lives, with Christ, in the sacrament of marriage.  

Our anniversary doesn’t just belong to us.  It is our public proclamation of our love for each other and our commitment to our union until death.  My husband and I can give thanks to God for bringing us together.  We can be an example of living marriage as a sacrament.  While being married for 17 years is not a record, it is something worth celebrating - publically!

Storms

An earthquake on Tuesday and a rain/wind weather event from Hurricane Irene on Saturday.  It has been an eventful weather week in the DC area.  During the past 24 hours, I don’t think I’ve had a conversation that hasn’t referenced the storm.  The news media has done nothing except play on our human fears, causing people to buy far more water, batteries and peanut butter than they will need in the coming year.  (I’m just thankful that they didn’t know the earthquake was coming.)

However, another event, with only a local impact, will most likely affect my life more than either of these events over the next months.  On Friday, I learned that a parish member, who has several young children, has ovarian cancer.  While we hear about all types of cancer in the news and are bombarded with requests to support cancer research, somehow when someone I know is diagnosed, cancer is spelled with a capital “C”.  Having lost my grandma, for whom I was named, and both parents to cancer, the news evokes all kinds of emotions. 

It makes me realize that it is time to get on my knees and pray for this family, as well as offer assistance with things like transportation, childcare and meals.  The forecasters of the outcome of this storm will not be meteorologists, but a variety of oncologists and their colleagues.   Family and friends at times will feel helpless, but those who trust in Christ and ask, “His will be done”, will not be hopeless.  Whatever the outcome of this storm, the suffering endured will create many blessings. 

When I think of the event of the past week, I realize that I must trust in Jesus.   No matter how unexpected or frightening the storm, I must believe that He knows what He is doing.  No matter how sorrowful or joyful the event, it is what I need at this moment.  Even when I would rather not hunker down, waiting for Irene to arrive or to hear of the illness of a friend, there is a reason for the event.

On this Monday morning, the weather forecast is for sunny, clear skies for the next few days.  The effects of the earthquake and Irene will soon be forgotten.  My fellow parish member and her family are adjusting to the unexpected news and assessing the next steps.  It is trust in our great and mighty Lord that will take us through this day and beyond. 

A Dark Forest

I spent last week at Goshen Scout Reservation – not because I love to sleep on a cot with a tent full of insects all week – but to assist the Boy Scouts in tracking their advancement. This job comes with all the amenities of camp – sleeping in tents, trips to the latrine in the middle of the night, and the need for flashlights and lanterns when the sun sets.  I am not an experienced camper and faced many challenges during the week.

Late in the afternoon of the second day of camp, we experienced a torrential rainstorm.  A river began to run through the adult campsite.  Our Boy Scouts gained great joy and satisfaction in coming to the rescue of the adults by building a dam of rocks and logs that diverted the water into the woods.  After dinner and the retiring of flags, adults had a “crackerbarrel”. (In Scout language, it is a get together with snacks.)  The events of the day had taken a toll on my mind and my body and I decided to go back to camp before my fellow leaders.

I carefully walked alone from the pavilion, past the commissary and halted as I was about to walk into the forest.  My journey so far had been in the dark, but there were lights on the buildings, so I had assistance of some light other than my flashlight.  I took one step on the path into the forest and hesitated.

“I can’t,” was my thought as my heart began to race and I felt a shiver of fear race up my back.  It was pitch black – as dark as I had ever experienced. Holding my flashlight horizontally, I couldn’t see our campsite. I couldn’t see the bridge that I had to cross.  I couldn’t even see down the hill.  When I shined the light at my feet, I could only see two, maybe three steps ahead.

This novice camper was about to run back to the safety of the crackerbarrel when a sudden surge of courage descended on me. I cautiously took one step at a time, into the forest, down the rocky path that lead to the bridge.  As I carefully navigated my way, I was suddenly struck by the thought that this experience was a reflection of one of my biggest challenges in walking with Christ.

By focusing systematically, allowing the flashlight to show me just the next step in my journey, I had all that I needed to safely reach my campsite.  Similarly, in life, the Lord gives me all that I need to take the next step.  But, I want to see the big picture and want to know where I am going.  Our Lord is with me every day, showing me the next step, but much of my day is spent thinking or worrying about next week, next month, next year and on and on.  As I crossed the bridge and began walking up the path to the campsite, I felt more confident and was not frightened during the final phase of the adventure.

Entering the campsite, I was still reflecting on the similarity of being guided by a flashlight and being guided by God. I must have needed to have the message reinforced. As I entered the camp, I shone the flashlight upward, creating a shadow that frightened me enough that I threw my arms up in the air and let my flashlight fly into the dark.  It fell under a tent platform. I had to get on my hands and knees, in the mud, and reach as far as I could to retrieve the flashlight.  As my fingers strained to grasp the flashlight, I couldn’t help but chuckle at the situation.  If I had kept the flashlight on the ground, I wouldn’t be retrieving my only light source from the mud. I pictured the Lord shaking his head, wondering how many times I was going to need to learn this lesson.

Then, I stood up and realized that I had left my backpack at the crackerbarrel.  “I won’t forget this evening,” I thought as I turned around and headed down the path in the dark.  This time, I knew that my flashlight was all that I needed and I enjoyed the walk though the dark forest.

When You Wish Upon a Star?!?!

Tuesday night, I was at DisneyWorld with my husband and 14 year-old son.  It was a beautiful summer night, contrasted by the pain that I felt from my feet that had traipsed around the Magic Kingdom for 14 hours.  At exactly 10 pm, the fireworks began.  And they were dramatic and colorful and loud. 

In order to understand the context of this post, you need to know that I have a love/dislike relationship with Disney.  It has been four years since we visited DisneyWorld and I wondered how I would feel about the experience this time.  I can't remember the number of times we were "welcomed home" on our first day.  The customer service is nearly perfect and we thoroughly enjoyed the days spent in the parks.  However, Disney is also a marketing machine that may be unsurpassed in the business world.  I couldn't help but think how many visitors will unpack their bags at home and wonder why they purchased all of the Disney merchandise.

So, as I am watching the fireworks and singing along with the song, I listen to the words.  "When you wish upon a star, your dreams come true."

All I could think is, "This is not the message we should be giving to our children".  We need to let them know that wishing upon a star will not give them what they need.  And even if their dreams do come true, it may not be why they were created for this world. 

The only way for them to get what they need, is to believe in the saving word of Jesus. Building a personal relationship with our Savior will help them to achieve what it is that they were born to do in this world.

Living that relationship does not preclude spending a few fun-filled days in a fantasy world filled with friendly characters and thrilling rides and beautiful fireworks. It just means that they -and we -must realize that it is simply a fantasy world and no amount of wishes on stars will help them fulfill their destinies.